Drug of Choice

Parenting is a drug. The highs are amazing, euphoric even. The lows: the worst come down ever. Nothing makes you confront your own feelings of inadequacy and fractures your sense of self-worth like a teenager with a bee in his (or her) bonnet. That same being you held to your breast and nurtured, that you … Continue reading Drug of Choice

Rocky Road

Our excitement at being pregnant for the first time in 2002 was short-lived. Tragically, our first pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 8 weeks. It was three days after the Bali bombing in 2002 that we lost our first little one. We were actually supposed to be in Bali with my ‘in-laws’, T’s parents, at the time, … Continue reading Rocky Road

An Uphill Battle

Conceiving our first child was by no means a simple task. My polycystic ovaries meant it was always going to be an uphill battle. Not that I knew this at the time. The long and short of it was I was never going to just fall pregnant without specialist help, whether I was gay or … Continue reading An Uphill Battle

Modern Family

Not everyone who wants to be a mother wants to carry a baby. For some women, that urge to physically grow another human never arrives; however the desire to be a mother does. The ‘maternal instinct’ comes in many forms, and is different for everyone. It is a spectrum – with those like me, who … Continue reading Modern Family

Ready or Not

We received an invitation for Master Z ‘and his family’ to have afternoon tea with the local member on Wednesday afternoon to celebrate his receiving a ‘Local Sporting Champion’ grant. He’s had a great year with his sport, playing hockey at National level plus State level for both club and school hockey. Initially, I felt … Continue reading Ready or Not

About a Boy

I was in London the day I learned I was expecting my first boy fifteen years ago. I was doing data entry at a dingy small scale factory style establishment near Croydon, walking distance from a hospital. Work was optional for me at this time, as my partner had been offered a contract working for … Continue reading About a Boy

Party of Five

  It’s 4am and I can’t sleep. Miss L, who is one, has had an unsettled night and is currently occupying my side of the bed. She is a terrible, restless sleeper and she has been ‘spoilt’ by being allowed to sleep against me since birth. I know, I know, I can sense the eye … Continue reading Party of Five